Lessons learned from a Halloween birthday

Halloween has always been my favorite secular holiday. It also has been a great day to have as a birthday. During my childhood I thought that Halloween and all the related hoopla was all about me. I would open my birthday presents over breakfast with my family and then head to school where all my classmates knew that Halloween and my birthday were synonymous.

We would rush home at noon, change into our carefully crafted and infrequently purchased costumes and then run back to school for an afternoon of fun. My mother always brought cupcakes and we had a party in our classroom before and after parading around the school and meeting with the other classes in the gym for a school-wide celebration. There was always lots of candy and candy-fueled laughter and high jinks. Teachers were patient and even fun on Halloween and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and each other. My birthday dinner was always early and festive, followed by trick or treating for fun and even more candy. The neighborhood streets were full of kids of all ages in costume and parents following the little ones. That was the Halloween of my youth.

The full afternoon of partying in costumes ended in middle school, but Halloween was still celebrated throughout my school years and the celebration of my birthday was intertwined for friends and family.

As an adult I still love Halloween. My husband and I typically take the day off and while we don’t dress up, we great each and every trick or treater with candy and check out their costumes - and always wish more would come our way. I have enjoyed the steady expansion of pumpkin flavored dishes from muffins and breads to soup, ravioli, bagels, ice cream and lattes.

I have embraced the trend of decorating for Halloween – inside and out. I collected pumpkin art – glass, ceramic, porcelain and prints, finding they can stay up much longer without carved faces, even year round in some cases. Actually I overdid the collecting and had to get rid of three-quarters of my collection when we moved to DC.

Slowly over the years I came to realize that Halloween was not all about me. I noticed that the other classrooms celebrated without seeming to know it was my birthday. As my world widened I noted that Halloween was celebrated by people I did not even know. My biggest shock came when I learned that some religious traditions do not approve of Halloween and certainly do not celebrate, or allow their children to celebrate a holiday they believe glorifies evil.

Having a Halloween birthday has taught me some life lessons, some more important than others:
=Even when I am positive it’s about me, its not.
=Sharing celebrations and traditions build communities and families.
=People can try on other identities without changing who they are.
=Good people can see the same thing very differently.
=Too much of a good thing is still too much.

Perhaps because we are at the end of what has been a very long and arduous presidential campaign, it occurs to me that candidates and their advisors could benefit from some of these life lessons. However, the lessons of Halloween are universal.